[ she'll let it go now, channeling elsa. her fingers run down the center of his chest, nails dragging the last centimeters until they catch on the edge of his underwear. she looks down briefly and then looks back up at cassian, expression almost adorably determined. ]
You can, one day, but only if you let me do the same.
[ tonight maybe there will be no time for lingering between her legs, but there is always next time. tomorrow night, maybe, or next week, or next month, or next year, however many next chances they have on this little moon. they have plenty of time to continue learning each other, learning what the other likes, what they like.
they have nothing but time. ]
Tonight, Captain, I want you to fuck me on the sofa until I scream.
[ she kisses him on the nose this time; soft, sweet expression incongruous with the filthy words coming out of her mouth. ]
[he ducks his head briefly into her shoulder after she kisses him on the nose of all places, mostly because he is trying to hide a laugh.]
[he can still comply, and he certainly wants to comply, but -]
Are you sure you don't want to move to the bed?
[there's a part of him that thinks it might be... nice. romantic? can that happen? but there's the other part of him that just keeps remembering the way it sounds to hear her say she wants him to fuck her, and moving to the bed clearly just wastes time.]
[ if he wants to light candles and be romantic, he can make the first move next time. ]
No, I don't. [ she wants to ruin this couch for anyone that sits on it. she really wants to defile some part of their home that another unsuspecting person might interact with so when they sit down during a visit she can look over and laugh because she and cassian fucked on that sofa. ] 'sides, the cat's on the bed.
[he tries to glance at it, to see if the cat really is sleeping there, but it's a mess of blankets and he can't really tell. not that it matters. jyn said couch, he isn't going to move now.]
[he sighs, but it's fond, then smiles down at her.]
I just want to fuck you. That's all I have wanted for the last while. [there, he said it. since she made her intentions clear earlier, that's exactly what he wanted.] We do have a comfortable sofa. Maybe it's perfect for it, but there is only one way to find out.
[ he says "i just want to fuck you" and it's like music and even though he keeps talking for some ridiculous reason, jyn decides to make better use of her time and lifts her hips to sweep her underwear off, wriggling until she can eventually kick them off ]
[oh. there goes her underwear. what he's waiting for now is to get over seeing her completely naked. his gaze travels all the way down slowly, watching scars and freckles along her skin as he makes his way back up to her face with a stupid, starstruck smile on his own. it takes him a second to remember they were very much in the middle of something, fascinated as he is by her.]
[he drags his hand down towards her hips and strays a little close towards her center.] There is one more obstacle in the way, if you would like to help me with it.
[he finds one of her hands and drags it to the edge of his underwear. take em off jyn!!]
[ jyn quickly gets to work, pushing his underwear down over his hips and carefully maneuvering them around (over?) his dick without being as careful to not touch him, soft pad of her thumb brushing down the length of him with a smile like sunshine. she's briefly distracted before she gets back to work, shoving his underwear the rest of the way down. at least down his thighs. ]
[he shudders and his breath catches when she touches him, trying very hard not to press into her hand. it's the completely bright and innocent smile, how dare she. he distracts himself by shoving his underwear the rest of the way down and off, not quite sure where it ends up but he doesn't seem to care.]
I asked. You didn't have to do it.
[well ok, if she can touch him on purpose, he can do the same. he dips his hand down briefly between her legs, sliding his fingers through coarse hair and making sure she is Ready To Go.]
[and also maybe just to see what she does, the fucking will commence soon he swears.]
[ she is 100% Ready To Go, warm and wet and wanting, and she jerks under his touch with a sharp gasp. the flush on her chest grows deeper, blush spreading to her cheeks as her eyes squeeze shut. ]
Do that again.
[ the fucking can take a pause if he keeps that up. ]
[he is 100% here for that sound and the way more of her skin turns red. her request - more of a demand, really - is one he can easily give in to, which he does with a very small innocent smile. found it, something else she likes.]
[his fingers slip between her folds, sliding and teasing, but it isn't meant to last or push her too far, and he doesn't try to dip inside of her. he finds himself sighing from it as though he's the one being touched, but he really was not lying when he'd told her listening and watching her really does do it for him.]
[ she knows cassian's fingers are deft and nimble but somehow never seemed to imagine it in relation to herself, at least not like this. he sighs and jyn swears, her hand curling around his bicep, nails pressing into his skin. not clawing, not digging, but it's close.
[yeah ok he is super into this. it's a hard press of her nails into his arm, and part of him wants to see how much tighter she can grab on.]
I think that is ultimately the goal. [he cannot resist! just like he can't resist keeping his hand in place. it's what he would do for anyone, but it feels especially good and nice with jyn, and if he wasn't so determined to just fuck her like he said, he would get her off like this.]
[but he can work his fingers against her for a little bit longer.]
[ it's frustrating that they've barely started and she feels like she is fraying at the seams already. she can't give in so easily! she refuses! they can take their time next time, they can explore and challenge and probably bicker next time. this time she has no patience. ]
[he swallows back any urge to ask her again if she's sure, if she's ready, if how they are is okay, any manner of questioning, though it doesn't feel like asking for her sake this time. it's something in him, which is ridiculous. he knows he wants her. she's made herself clear, that's what matters.]
[he sinks into her with a shudder and a sigh, keeping still with how overwhelming it is until she urges him on with impatience. he fucks her on the sofa, just like she asked, and even though he gets very caught up in it too, he does his best to make sure she's enjoying it, to make sure he doesn't hurt her. he doesn't make a lot of noise, just tiny sighs and whispers of her name. everything is to make sure she finishes before him, he's very determined on that.]
[ she comes with a scream, head thrown back on the couch and her nails digging into cassian's back, having left scratches all down his back and crescent moons across his arms and faint marks of her teeth on his shoulder and neck. she doesn't mean to leave marks, there is nothing possessive about it, she isn't trying to mark her territory, she simply wants to hold him as close as possible.
slumping against the couch, satiated and spent and sweaty, legs shaking around him, jyn breathes out a laugh. one hand falls to rest across her stomach and a stupidly pleased smile softens her expression, eyes closed as she tries to control her breathing. ]
[the way she clings and holds on to him is A Lot. he very much likes it, but it's not something he's felt quite like that before. jyn wants him close, because it's him. he sends her over the edge with a scream, and it doesn't take him too much longer to follow. he buries his face in her neck and groans into her skin.]
[cassian looks at her after, sweaty and smiling and he did that. she looks so happy and almost soft and there's still a sense of togetherness in the air. it's heavy and strange but still warm, her legs tangled around him and it's almost like they're just... going to settle in now. bask in the afterglow. he smiles at her and laughs.]
And not terrible, if my back has anything to say about it.
[he kisses her gently on the lips, waiting for his breathing to even out.]
I'm not sorry, [ jyn retorts, humor laced through her words and dripping from her tone. ]
Definitely not terrible. [ the agreement is slightly belated if only because she had to defend her scratches first, that seemed more important in the moment. ] It was...
[ what is the word? it's practically foreign to her. ] Nice.
I don't mind. [he doesn't, in theory. he's going to catch glimpses of all the marks the next day or so and just remember how much she wanted him.]
[the rise and fall of her chest slows, but his own feels like it's tightening and constricting his lungs. he can put it in a box, he's always good at shoving away physical discomforts.]
[but then there is jyn still beneath him, warm and comfortable and everything about this is just... intimate, in ways he isn't used to. he feels very open right now, and he can't seem to seal up that box.]
Nice. [he's smiling despite the simplicity of the word, despite the way it's starting to feel like the air is getting sucked right out of him. nice. is he allowed to have nice?] Yeah. It was very nice.
[ eyes fluttering open, her fingers lift to touch at the faint imprint of her teeth against his collar bone. it wasn't intentional possessive at the time but now... now that she has the ability to linger, she rather likes it. indelible proof that she was there. ]
's not really the right word, is it?
[ she hums a considering noise, feeling warm and content, but she can't think of how she should describe it so she doesn't. when they had first kissed she had been a skittish bantha, running away to finn because she couldn't deal with her own emotions. they had settled since then, she had settled, and while most of the time she still feels like a disaster, she feels a little bit more whole with cassian, like he is helping her find all her broken pieces so she can put herself back together.
this was another broken piece and she feels more whole again. ]
[she touches him and the contact startles him. she's so content, she's laying with him, she doesn't want to leave, so why does cassian suddenly feel like he needs to? he's happy. he is definitely happy. but maybe he doesn't know how to actually be happy.]
It does not feel like... enough.
[he doesn't know what is enough. he doesn't know how to describe any of this.]
[his smile falters as his throat seemingly closes up.] I -
[he can't breathe. he tries to draw in a breath, but it's more like a gulp for air.] It's -
[nice. sex with jyn was nice. and a million other things he doesn't know how to even begin sorting.]
jyn scrambles to sit up, the movement leaving her feeling almost bereft for not being surrounded by cassian anymore. she doesn't dwell on it, pushing cassian to sit up as well.
he can't breathe. is he choking? does he have some kind of respiratory illness she doesn't know about because she's a horrible friend that doesn't ask him questions about himself? was it actually not nice sex at all and he took a second second lullaby and now she's going to watch him drown on dry land? every terrible and impossible scenario spins through jyn's mind. ]
Cassian, what's wrong? [ he can't breathe, jyn, how is he supposed to answer? she realizes this. ] Do you need water? Air? I can call Jim and have him bring Victor over?
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